The Oppenheimer whimper

Remember that cliche about a week being a long time in the world of moving action, this was never more true than now, here, in our town Jozi-

Now and again I read newspapers from such august places as Vancouver, Auckland and Toronto; the Emirates even and other places in between. I'm always struck by their lack of drama and what drama there is, is worked to death, almost instantly. By contrast we have so much news that most of it is buried instantly-sometimes the most buried stories contain intriguing meat-

I see that the pre-current issue of my Auckland news focuses on public response to an artist's impression of what a new proposed world cup rugby stadium would look like should the Newies ever decide to give it the go ahead. This, and the associated parking issue, will be headline news for months. In Dubai the issue is the quad-bike and the hooligans who wield them, while the Toronto press is mainly concerned with tax issues and the cost of things.

The most serious crime reported in the Toronto press concerns the travails of a man in a Toronto suburb who was relieved of his wallet after being 'swarmed' by a gang of [undefined] men. A week later the headlines are roughly similar, and there is some risidual mumbling about a school shooting that took place months ago... the biggest event in a decade i gather.

Compare this to our own more fecund experience. Headlines of the past week deal with a man convicted of having an undesirable relationship with the [former] deputy president, who goes to jail, and is immediately, and controversially, moved to a more comfortable jail stocked to the gunnels with young boys. Earmark a debate, says Perlman, before his chat show is swamped with urgent matters..

The beginnings of comment on this are snuffed out by routine news of murder and mayhem, as heist gangs roam the suburbs, wreck cars, kill citizen, shoot babies off their mother's backs, burn their enemies [those who guard mobile money boxes] and wipe out any of the forces of good in their paths-These have become 'pop-up' headlines recurring with such frequency that they barely arouse comment. Laced through these is the start of a rape trial involving TWO HUNDRED AND SIXTY ONE COUNTS OF RAPE One would imagine a koke routine at least but- the headlines are barely dry and the story is obsolete- the funeral of a former tyrant barely merits a byline and both pale before the next story to the effect that -

A leading politician, jailed for fraud or something, is enjoying boozy weekends at home and his four-year jail sentence has miraculously morphed into a four-month sentence with time off for good behaviour -I'll bet the system will be inundated with requests from other criminals for such miraculous events to occur to their sentences. We'll earmark a debate, says Perlman, again- more plaintive this time- there are days when Perlman's qualities are stretched to breaking point-. The debate proved 'chattery' when it did happen- It was quickly superseded though-

By midmorning relieved officials could announce the mass slaughter of 17 farm workers whose transport was whacked by a passing train-politicians raced to be first with the usual clutch of empty rhetoric and meaningless promises.

In the middle of all this a report leaks on Classic radio that the richest family in the country has sold off one third of their holdings in the country's biggest company: the business founded by their ancestors back in the nineteenth century. Further news confirms that a fat cat Chinese businessman has bought their shares. A simpatico story in the Sunday Crimes suggests [unconvincingly] charitable motives involving the wider continent.

After this we cut to Parliament where that august institution passes a new Civil Union Bill that bypasses marriage in a controversy loaded half-an-hour-before-tea. The Union Bill enables same sex couples to join together in unholy - well - Union. And while an instant of controversy drips all over the pages of various media someone leaked a few million litres of jet fuel into a bird sanctuary in a wild takeover bid that was immediately ignored because-.

All this news is immediately swamped by a discursive furore that erupts like a hasty storm in a fragile teacup when the presiding judge in an aforementioned corruption trial announces that he has been misquoted and the entire country erupts in fury.

And then while ten debates are roaring away like a series of fast moving volcanoes the news breaks that a prominent citizen has been arrested in connection with the murder last year of a controversial mining figure, the so-called "Fat MAn"- So Friday brings the 'Spotlight' that, according to Perlman, now falls on Glenn Agliotti [an alleged drug kingpin, according to SAFM, who is associated in some smeary way with the chief of police in the country] and Mr Selebi [the police chief] .

With the prospect of a juicy distraction in the form of a celebrity murder-Gosh we haven't had a real celeb' type murder since that girl-whatsername-was kidnapped from a university car park a while back, and the "last" socialite Hazel Crane [what! we used to have socialites ] was assassinated on her way to court- Perlman is having a field day.

Delete consciousness rules and no one, other than the brief aforementioned simpatico moment in the Sunday Crimes, has given a second thought to the significance of the tucked away tale of the Oppenheimer's retreat from Anglo. In fact in retrospect the non-announcement of the Oppenheimer sell-off is reminiscent once again with remarkable poignancy of Eliot's catch phrase 'not with a bang but a whimper". Have these rich nobs become so peripheral to our day to day existence that their pending disembarkation leaves us stone cold- or are we just to busy to notice or even care.

Nonetheless it is curious that there have been no public pronouncements from the usual firebrands, of the ilk that reacted so vehemently to the judge's misquotation,So much for misdirection.

So it seems no-one wants to talk much about the news that the Oppenheimer family has apparently sold off one third of its holdings in Anglo-American to an organisation that has the word China in its name. One would have assumed the Liberation lobby would have been leaping for glee that the old imperialist capitalist rich nobs, hated by som many for their 'taking' ways, who exploited the people for the past century or so, are moving on and have 'done' a most intriguing 'empowerment' deal with the new partners for African development who are forging deals all over the continent.

Strange to think that Anglo-American once owned about 90 percent of the listed companies on the JSE. It is certainly a shadow today of that former self-Now it's main operations have moved offshore, the company has morphed like Mr Yengini's sentence into another unanticipated form and the local branch is now rapidly vanishing. Within two years it will have ceased to exist- It has apparently served its purpose and now it is on its way out. Talk is rife that the company is positioning itself as a takeover target.

Presumably, well according to the sub texts in the Crimes article, the Oppenheimer's are selling up their concentrated holdings in our world in order to liberate themselves to play the greater world markets with far greater anonymity than they can manage being the big fish in our local pond. This is a sensible idea. These are global citizens and it is best that like all global citizens they hide themselves in comfortable places where rich people abound and they will not be noticed while they move their money to where it makes the most 'more money' - Regular readers may recollect my blog on going liquid sometime back [Staying liquid 9/03/06] in which I dealt with the trend against owning hijackable assets in a world increasingly mobilising to steal them a la Chavez, or Morales or who knows who may be lurking like the cobra Mugabe in our own shadows. In a world that rationalises the theft of assets sensible people follow Mr Micawbers advice: 'Keep they property portable' [Great Expectations: Charles Dickens]

Maybe no one wants to talk about the Oppenheimer decision to move a chunk of their assets into other extra-territorial venues. It's as your favourite raconteur playboy uncle announces that he's secretly gay [and doesn't seek 'Union']. Nonetheless the truth is they are leaving the party and have been for some time. So why are we hearing no cheers of joy?

And then there was that other piece of news that never made headlines. This according to a brief radio news report was from a conference in Cape Town where, apparently, concerns were raised about the declining levels of foreign investment in the local, recently hijacked, mining industry. [The details of this report were unclear- it is never to easy to get an intelligible news report on UJFM where the music is great, and the station is, as they regularly affirm, young enough to get away with inarticulate and broadly incoherent news reporting.]

This [decline in investment] is understandable. In a world where the rules regarding investments have become flexible money also becomes flexible. Smart money avoids those places where moral outrage rules. Headlines confirming this will continue to play a low profile in our moment to moment existence.

On a flippant note perhaps the Oppenheimers are feeling chastened that none of their garden parties [assuming they still have garden parties] have made the society pages lately [mainly because there is so little 'Society' left in our news saturated town]; and such news is reduced to the occasional byline, unlike Vancouver and Toronto [for instance] where their society pages are the only news worth reading in such places where people 'have it all' and are left to obsess over the occasional pothole and dog litter left on pavements.

So if no one is going to say nice things about one's little soirees then it must be time for a new venue. After all what's the point of having money if bragging about it is so inconvenient.